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    Polandball Fanon Wiki

    Commonwealth of Americaball

    The Commonwealth of Americaball, formerly British North Americaball, doesn't exist is a countryball living in North America. His clay mainly borders Alaskaball and Mexicoball and is very close to the Danish autonomous territory of Greenlandball. He is the descendant of British North Americaball.

    History

    TBA

    Relationships

    Friends/Amis/Amigos

    • UKball - My father! I hated those taxes, causing the revolution. But today, he considers me to be his PROUDEST, STRONGEST, AND COOLEST achievement ever. He even gave me the actors for Game of Thrones and Star Wars. He thinks I should use the "correct way" of speaking in English and use the goddamn liberal commie metric system! Sorry Dad, but I'm not interested because I'm more into 'merican English and the Imperial system!
    • Franceball - Stepmother who never got the chance to raise me because She got defeated by UKball. She is also my first ally along with Morocco, despite being a dumb sack of coward cheese who doesn't want to bash kebabs and terrorists with me. Thanks for discovering explosive artillery and aviation; I love to play with it! And also thanks for the Statue of Liberty.
    • File:Ireland-icon.png Irelandball - Potatoes, JackSepticEye, and a huge part of my population, including a lot of Columbian Prime Ministers.
    • Germanyball - Sausages. Thanks for immigrants. We used to be enemies in both World War I and World War II, but we kicked his butt and taught him a lesson. Now we allied against Pootis in World War 3.
    • File:Italy-icon.png Italyball - Pizza is good.
    • File:Second Spanish Republic-icon.png Spainball - Foster mother and founder of Mexicoball, and a cool person. Thanks for giving me Floridaball. Sorry Spain, you gotta respect if they want to become independent.
    • File:Belgium-icon.png Belgiumball - Waffles and maybe fries. Thanks for immigrants in File:NYC-icon.png New York.
    • Netherlandsball - Uncle!!! We wouldn't exist without them, although they don't get why. He has a weird stash of weed too, but we don't ask about that.
    • Cubaball - A brother whom Trudeau visits during his vacation. I also like visiting his theme parks and beaches. I can see he enjoys my Six Flags Over Comanche and Disneyland theme parks, and every major theme park up and down my country.
    • Panamaball - Woke brother. We share money, and cut them in half built a canal for them. We removed Emmanuel Noriega for you! I would love to visit that volcano that shows both the Pacific and the Atlantic. He's a weed enjoyer and likes all my adult cartoons (and also Pokemon).

    Neutral

    • Africansball - Look, people, I'm sorry for what I did during the slave years, that was the old me. My Pop back in 1833 wanted slavery to end but racism to still exist in the south. But in the 1950's I came to my senses and come to see that was messed up, so thanks to Martin Luther King Jr., I removed the racist system. Also that controversy with George Floyd and many others. Yeah. I hope we can improve relations (again).
    • Californiaball - Known for her GMOs, movies, relaxed liberals, and technology. And also giant redwoods. Some people think they're geniuses; most believe they are insane. It's the home of Green Day. It is also where fortune cookies come from. You had a drought three years ago. It's where Americans settle to do porn. What? Are you trying to declare war? Don't fight us, I warn you! The Californian-Columbian War will never happen!
    • File:First Mexican Empire-icon.png Mexicoball - We are neutral, because while we are good friends, I'm just tired of him always jumping my border (GET. OFF. THE. F*CKING. FENCE.) Another neighbor of mine, I met him when we were kids (Thirteen Coloniesball and New Spainball), he is a good friend... but sometimes we argue, since we have different points of view about some things, he always criticizes some of my brilliant ideas (like the Iraq War). We known each other for a long time, but our relationship seems to be somewhat complicated. Anyways, he helped me in some situations (like providing aid to me in the chaotic aftermath of Hurricane Katrina). Although I hate him wall-jumping, then again, who else is going to serve me my McDonald's?

    Enemies/Aversaires/Enemigos

    • USSRball - OH, YOU ARE THE WORST!!!! I WILL NUKE YOU I WILL SUCK UP YOUR CITIZENS I WILL EXECUTE THEM I WILL ANNEX YOUR AUTHORITARIAN COMMIE TOWNS AND BEHEAD PUTIN AND XI!!! SOON OUR GLORIOUS DOMINION WILL REIGN!!!!! I WILL GUT YOU LIKE A PIG AND MAKE YOU SUFFER LIKE MY HERSHEY SLAVES!!!! BETTER DEAD THEN RE-NO! STOP!! PLEASE DON'T LAUNCH ICBMS! PLEASE DON'T MAKE US SUBMIT!! NO!! I WILL NEVER BECOME YOUR SLAVE! BRITAIN AND I WILL KICK YOUR BUTT! AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHH! 1989 BEST DAY OF LIFE! I REGRET NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But thanks for your help in WW2 and splitting Germany in two to teach him a lesson.
    • CHILD ABUSER - YOU EVIL AUTHORITARIAN File:NYC-icon.png NEW YORK KNOCKOFF!!! HOW DARE YOU MISUSE THAT VIDEO PLATFORM CALLED VYOND?! YOU KNOW IT'S A BUSINESS APP, NOT A TOOL TO MAKE VIDEOS DEPICTING CHILD ABUSE AS HILARIOUS! THERE'S NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT CHILD ABUSE OR A SCREWED-UP JUSTICE SYSTEM! YOUR POLICE FORCE IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST IN THE DOMINION, THEY ARREST KIDS FOR PETTY REASONS AND EVEN EXECUTE THEM FOR COMMITTING TOO MANY "CRIMES" THAT ARE MERE MISDEMEANORS! AND WHAT THE FUDGE ARE YOU DOING WITH SWITZERLAND'S CHEESE AND IT BEING A PUNISHMENT? I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!! GO SECEDE OR SOMETHING, YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE PART OF THE DOMINION ANYMORE! YOU CAN EVEN JOIN THAT INGSUCKER FOR ALL I CARE! REMOVE!!!
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